A Different Sort of Service

A dozen faces were arranged across the computer screen during Sunday morning’s Zoom meeting, waiting for the weekly service to begin. The conversation was marked by jovial banter and irreverent humor, with discussions of coffee and coffee floats mixed with talk of a pandemic-themed board game.

Three participants utilized a virtual background, including one depicting now-famous Four Seasons Total Landscaping. People gathered singly, or in pairs, in their kitchens, bedrooms or living rooms. A cat named Mila walked across one screen just before the service was to begin.

Despite it being a Sunday morning during the pandemic, this was not a virtual church service. In fact, in one important way, it was quite the opposite.

“It’s hard not to make church comparisons because it’s a Sunday morning gathering for people to listen to someone say something. But I’ve described it as like church, minus God and plus a Ted Talk,” Adam Messinger said.

The 43-year-old software developer was one of 12 attendees at Sunday’s regularly scheduled meeting of Wichita Oasis. He said the group is a secular humanist organization that offers the community aspect that many non-religious people have difficulty finding.

“You get the same kind of support network as you would get with a church,” said 34-year-old Liz Sadler, Messinger’s spouse.

For almost four years, Wichita Oasis has been meeting each Sunday, with additional social gatherings sprinkled in throughout the year. The group was formed from members of the Air Capital Skeptics and a local book club for atheists, said chapter president Erin Shields.

The 34-year-old Wichitan is finishing up her two-year term as president of the board of directors. She said that the local organization is part of a group of affiliated chapters throughout the country, including one in Kansas City.

During the first two years of its existence Wichita Oasis met in the building that houses the Wichita Orpheum theater. Since then, the organization has leased a space on the campus of the Wichita United Church of Christ at 6000 E. Harry Street, Shields said.

“An angel investor helped us. They made a huge donation to cover the cost of getting a space,” Shields said.

Since the beginning of the pandemic the group’s Sunday meetings have all been held virtually. Shields said that it can be hard to translate their pre-COVID-19 meetings into a virtual meeting because people often aren’t as comfortable on video.

“It’s hard to be at a distance in a Zoom meeting; like when you sit in the back row at a meeting,” she said.

Before the pandemic, the in-person routine stayed the same each Sunday:

The doors would open at 10:30 a.m. with coffee and breakfast items available for members. The service would begin at 11 a.m. with music from a local band, followed by announcements about upcoming community service projects or social events, Shields said.

They would then have a “community moment.” Shields said this was an opportunity for members to address everyone about something serious, like health struggles, or less-than-serious, like a Powerpoint presentation about a member’s obsession with licorice.

The “community moment” would be followed by “up-and-down,” which Shields said was the sharing of short pieces of news. Then the main program would begin. Guest speakers typically cover a topic about history, science or social issues.

Shields said that the organization has attempted to keep the routine the same in their virtual meetings, though they have had more difficulty getting speakers during the pandemic.

For 33-year-old Wichita stay-at-home mom Laura Vitanova, the social aspect of Wichita Oasis is what keeps her coming.

“A lot of people who go to Oasis come from a religious background where they grew up attending church and their social lives revolved heavily around going to church every Sunday,” Vitanova said, “As people decide they no longer want to go to a Christian church, we still miss that feeling of fellowship and seeing people you like and want to hang out with every week. It fills that hole or void that is left when you stop going to church.”

Kevin Gaines, the 36-year-old director of operations, said that Wichita Oasis is a humanist organization. It is not anti-religion, but is simply non-religious.

“Atheism and humanism are not synonyms. You can be one without the other and you can hang out at Oasis without talking about what your supernatural beliefs are,” Gaines said.

Vitanova said that at least one member identifies as Christian and others are agnostic. She had been religious for much of her life but eventually became a secular humanist.

Gaines was raised Catholic, but after college became agnostic and eventually atheist.

“I guess in hindsight I felt what people wanted me to feel. Not to discredit the church I was a part of. It was a fantastic community. That was indisputable. As I grew up a little bit more, I became more conscious of a lot of serious social issues, like the LGBT community and child abuse…” he said.

Erin Shields said she believes that members of Oasis are searching for fulfillment, just like members of religious organizations. There is a scientific basis for the human connection and togetherness they seek.

“I was an altar kid. I was the lead acolyte at my church when I was a senior in high school and I certainly had those moments where there are so many emotions and all of that flow of hormones and the chemistry that’s happening in your body, in the moment, felt like a religious experience,” she said.

Shields said that when people leave a religion where meaning comes from a relationship with God and reading scripture, it often leaves them questioning their purpose once they are no longer religious. Her own answer to that question is that meaning comes from making a difference in people’s lives.

“The feelings I would get from the most profound church encounter as a child, I don’t feel that way anymore,” said Kevin Gaines, “But what I do feel is a lot of optimism and hope for seeing the compassionate efforts of the other people in the community, especially when we used to be able to meet in person and collaborate on charitable projects. That feeling of all of us working toward a goal. That was a lot more profound.”